A year later

And there have been many of changes...

I did not get the job I was worrying over in the last post and I am grateful for that. The job was Museum Director at a small museum which had been hugely affected by the down-turn in the economy.
I don't want to beg for money for a living. 

I've had 2 more interviews since. 

One I totally aced but they moved the in-house lady up.  I know her, she is very good at the job.  Later both interviewers fell all over themselves to tell me I had interviewed well and had made the decision difficult for them.  I thought two things.  "Yes, I know, I was ready for this interview, I was on, I would be a great at this job."  And, "Anything I can do to make your life more difficult, you just let me know".  Not nice, I know, but at the time I was really hurt.

The other interview was for a teacher's aide position at the elementary school here in town.  I am a teacher.  I have two degrees and 10 years experience but this school seems to hire from their teachers-working-as-aids pool so I thought I'd give it a couple years and see if anything comes of it.  I was again ready for this interview.  I knew I could do the job and so much more.  I got that job.  And why not.  A highly qualified teacher willing to work for $10 an hour and no benefits, they would have been foolish not to hire me.

It took a couple days of soul searching to finally say, "Yes" to the job. It is less money.  Fewer hours a week, no work during the summer and same $ per hour.  And I would not be able to sub as a second job.  Investment in the future or a silly pipe dream.  There was a lot to consider.

When I started this new job I was shocked to find out what all it entailed.  Although I am an aide, I plan, teach, call parents, am a part of parent/teacher meetings and keep records that could become a part of the children's permanent record.

There are three of us doing the same job in one room.  One woman is paid as a teacher the other two are paid hourly with the added responsibilities of book room librarian and recess duty.

I now have 3 part-time jobs.  One job I work simply to pay for health insurance. 

We, teachers-working-as-aids, talk among ourselves about the possibility of the school needing more teachers next year.  The possibility is slim.  One teacher and only one is retiring.  Four of us want the position - if seniority is considered, I am low 'woman' on the totem pole.

Will there be even more changes?

I have an interview in 2 weeks.  Really, board of directors, 2 weeks!  That's a long time to sit and wonder/worry about what I'll say and how they will see me.  I know several people on the board.  You know, several, like half...  Will that help or hurt my chances?  Just how many people will be there to interview me?  How in the world am I going to convince them that I will be great at something I've never done before?  I'm worried that I will look stupid in the interview, I'm worried that they will not hire me, I'm worried that they will hire me... Is there anything else that I could possible worry about?

My Little Home

It's been over a year. I've moved twice-he got the house-and am settled into what I think of as 'my little home'.   It is indeed little.  As a married couple we lived in a drop-dead-gorgeous 4000 sq. ft. house.  My little home is a simply, 900 sq ft, brick ranch.  It is just what I was looking for- inexpensive and something I can take care of myself.  I looked at several rundown 100 year old houses, full of personality and issues, issues I could not begin to reach- let alone deal with.

The boys had fits over having to share a bedroom.  The girl-home from college-was going to spend the whole summer with her father, as there was "not enough room"...  I explained to the girl--this is family and there is always room for family.  Sometimes I slept on the couch and sometimes she slept on the couch.  The boys still fuss with each other but more nights then not, I hear them talking and laughing together as they settle down to sleep...and I smile...they will be friends.

It is done

The divorce papers were signed by the judge on Friday, October 8, 2010 at 3PMish.

It was not the original plan...

Plan A- grow up, get married, have kids, grow old together. 
Well, I grew up, got married, had kids but the grow old (or older) together just didn't work for me.
So now I am left with Plan B.
But I've never had a Plan B.